Friday, November 27, 2009

Dear Cat 1 men,

Hey guys, what's up? It's us, the back of the field.

Nope, Further back.

Yeah, there. Hi!

It's probably been awhile since you've been back here, so let me give you a little update. Things are tough. Not just the normal, "i'm going to get lapped and my legs and lungs burn too much to do anything about it" brand of tough. That's to be expected, that's why we sign up for these things.

This is different. It's the starts I want to write to you about. Not sure if you realize it or not, but you've been sending a lot of debris our way lately. Debris we don't see coming. All we can see is the ass of the four guys in front of us. We love love receiving new bikes just as much as you do, we just don't want them delivered to our faces while we are trying to race.

stole this from colin's seatcam; crossresults, crossresults, crossresults. there, we're even.

Next thing we know our front wheel is embedded in someone's ribcage, our rear wheel is three feet off the ground, and simply finishing the race is so much more painful than it needs to be.

funny story. see that red and black redline behind those yellow shoes on the left? that's the flying bike in the picture above, one day later. looks like dylan brought her home and clipped her wings on saturday night.

If Ricky want's to come back and race with us, that's cool. We'd love to have him. Can you make sure to send him back on his bike, and upright? His is a fast wheel, by which I would love to be dragged through the straights, assuming it's on the ground in front of me, not wedged firmly in my groin.

You guys are faster than us. We acknowledge that and let you go first, we stay out of your way and don't ruin your race. All we are asking for in return is for you to not ruin our race. Don't send your bikes flying back at us. Don't send bodies back at us. Just let us ride for 50 minutes, we'll stay out of the way as you lap us, and we all go home in one piece. That cool? You can even take our entry fees home with you.


the pack fodder


  1. I hear that at The Ice Weasels spectators are going to be encouraged to hurl their bikes at the Cat 1 men. More to the point I think.

  2. Please help a lonely pedal body find its way home! I have a spindle that feels useless and alone! davidaldenstpierre(at)

    A meager reward is available...