Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Providence Day One, race report.

Location: Staging, Providence Day1, elite race.
Position: Last "row" (do 3 non-consecutive dudes qualify as a "row"?)
Goal: Do not get lapped.


dear ibc, skinsuits! kisses, kevin

Holy shit...

...am I the only one here without carbon wheels? I can remember the smell of the first turn well. The pavement ended, and everyone jacked up their brakes for the turn onto the grass. The air was thick with the rancid smell of burning carbon. If that doesn't intimidate you, you've probably smelt smoking carbon rims before. I had not. I was intimidated, and a bit repulsed. That shit reeks.

Cat3's are your friends.

All those cat3s that hated me before? Well, now they're my fans. The fan club's numbers have swelled, I think we're up to 5 or 6 now. We're going to have to find a bigger conference room. Not sure if only Cat3's know who I am, or if they were living vicariously through me, but they were loud. When you're drooling all over yourself, your vision is blurry, and your throat tastes like blood, volume is the only thing that gets through. Thanks Cat3 men, we cool now?

"you're doing it"

Whoever it was that was saying "you're doing it" on the last two laps, rock on. Sure, it was bit creepy, but it was exactly what was going through my head at that point in time. "you're doing it". Not only was I in front of Colin, but I wasn't going to get lapped, all of my wildest dreams were fulfilled. "you're doing it". I thank you, anonymous spectator, we were on the exact same page.

if you squint, it kinda looks like i know what i'm doing.

Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch....

Back when I was weighing the pros and cons of upgrading my mountain bike license, one of the cons was race length. The pain and agony of the last lap would double. Well, when you go from Cat3 to Elite, you have to do about 4 last laps. Gloucester Day2, my time was 39 minutes and change. Providence Day1? 1:04 and change. That is well over a 50% increase. I had no idea lap cards could go so high.

In summary

Kevin 1 : Colin 0.

(all photos courtesy of doublehop.blogspot.com, the bestest, doublehoppiest, photographiest, cyclocross photo blog in the world. they rule.)

(Late edit: I ended up 34th out of 55. Seriously, I beat 20 elite cyclocross racers.)


  1. Wait wait wait, I asked you if you'd buy an IBC skinsuit if I lobbied for an order and you said no. So you changed your mind? Now that it's late October? God I hate you.

  2. You should have mentioned that I would be beating you in elite races when you asked; I'm sure my answer would have been different.

    Your hatred fuels me.


  3. I was not the "your doing it" fan, but I am one of the 5-6 loud fans. Maybe someone was yelling "Dude your killing it!" That would make more sense.

    Good job.

  4. I look forward to Sunday's race report, in that case.

  5. I'm glad my, how you say? — "bitch slap of a backhanded compliment" helped to drive you over the edge and upgrade. It was the right thing to do and you are "doing it."

    And now, because I am a total dick of a Mis-Director Sportif...

    No matter how much I squint at that photo, your elbow is still outside your saddle. A man of your "stature" would benefit greatly from suit-casing properly. Slow down at the next race and when Rooter catches up to you, ask him how to suitcase like a Pro.

    xo -t

  6. we were yelling.

    you were working.

    a bunch of us less daring 3's will be chasing you soon, hopefully to the yells of other less daring 3's.

    well done.

  7. so happy you liked my images, thrilled that you liked them so much, you used them on your blog.
    sad that you forgot doublehop so quickly...

  8. I think it was JeeWilly saying that from the beer tent, if I recall.

    NEBC has spiffy skin-suits.